People are easy

What do people want?

Recognition. Praise. Approval. Encouragement. Gratitude. Acceptance. Respect. Appreciation. Love. To be heard. To be understood. To be taken seriously.

Give a person these things, and they will do without food, they will do without possessions, they will do without money.

Give a person these things, and they will be yours forever. You will have their heart, their allegiance, their trust, their loyalty, their love.

I once worked for an employer who gave me massive and regular praise, support, public recognition. An office to myself, all the resources I needed, and full licence to create solutions for the company. It was heaven to start with; I achieved so much.  For them I worked extra hours, got involved in all aspects of the business, contributed to other people's projects, set up efficient systems, invented ways of making money, saving money, providing a better service to the customers.

Unfortunately, management attitudes changed during the time I was there, and my last year there was hell.  They started  ignoring me, which was painful enough, but then stooped to criticising and insulting me. It was at that time in my life I realised I didn't work just for a pay packet. I worked for job satisfaction, for praise and appreciation, I value kind words and a friendly atmosphere more than I value money.

Working just for money is such a soul destroying activity.

That's why I say people are easy. They are easy to work out, easy to deal with. Simply give them the time, recognition, gratitude, respect and love they so desperately crave for inside, and they'll do anything for you.

So, why don't we do this?

Knowing all this about our fellow human beings,

Why do we still think that paying our employees is enough?

Why do we shout at people to make them do what we want?

Why do we punish children for doing wrong, instead of praising them when they do something right?

Why do we criticise our partner, to try and make them change?

Why do we put someone down, in a vain attempt at improving them?

I would suggest that NONE of these negative methods work, none will get the best out of our fellow human beings. These evil methods only have the effect of alienating us from our fellow employees, friends, family.

Tell an angry person they are right, empathise with them, and the situation diffuses immediately.

Thank a disgruntled cleaner on your way home at night, and you will make their day.

Say a kind word about someone, stick up for them, and they will remember this in the future when you have a problem.

Give your boss the credit for your good ideas, and they will remember you when they are dishing out the end-of-year bonuses.

Take the example of a sales person. The customer doesn't want your product - if they did they would order it on-line, at their leisure, in the comfort and silence of their own home, and get it delivered to their door. No, what the customer wants is to be respected, to feel important, valued, heard, consulted.

How do you get people to do what you want? Give them what they want!

It's so simple.

This isn't manipulating - this is Loving People!